I like to think I'm an Ok mom. Better than average, on a good day. But I'm always trying to find ways to be better. One thing, I've been less than stellar at is positive reinforcement. It's not that I don't know it's important. I do. I'm really good at punishing negative behavior, so it's not just neglect of noticing what they are doing. I really don't know why I'm not better, but thought it was time to try something new.
In Gavin's class, they are rewarded with "President Slips" for good behavior. You might remember a few weeks back when he was President for a week because he had accumulated the most slips. I liked the idea and wanted to implement something similar in our home. Shawn and I discussed my idea with the boys and we did some tweaking ~ all four of us. And here is what we came up with:
When we notice one of the boys doing something good, we reward them with "good behavior points". I have a T & a G on a dry erase board and when they earn one, they get a little tick on the board. Conversely, when they are being really rotten, they can have one easily wiped away. They earn them for being sweet to each other ~ I try to "catch" them as often as I can. They also earn them for doing chores... especially if they have not been asked to do them. At the end of the week, the child with the most points gets to have special privileges on Sunday ~ such as picking the movie we watch as a family and picking the meal for dinner.
So far, our meals have consisted of hot dogs (G) and butter noodles (T).
They love it and get really excited to earn points... But they also are getting competitive with it. Tyler reminded me a couple times last week that I told Gavin I'd take away a point for something ornery he'd done. He also reminds me that he took the recycling out without me asking (2 times even!). And now they fight over who gets to do the easier chores...
We might have created good behavior monsters.
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4 comments:
Hot dogs and butter noodles?
Wow. No ice-cream?
Sometimes I get in a real rut with a kid and need to remind myself to say at least five positive things. Sometimes, it's very much a "fake it till you make it" thing. But you know how kids can get in their own ruts and then we just dig each other deeper, yeah?
One thing I've come up with is a notebook for each child. At the end of each day, no matter if someone has been having a real tough (i.e. tantrum-y day) I write some positive in the book. "M was dressed and ready for breakfast without me reminding her. She's really showing maturity and should be proud of herself." The kids love reading the positive comments and it helps to show the love even when we've had an especially bad day.
What a cool "system"! That would work well for my Boy - he's into having good behavior recognized/rewarded. My Girlie, however, could care less. =)
In my 4th grade classroom we had a “Caught Doing Good Poster” There was a marker attached and anyone at anytime could go up to the poster and write down a good thing that they were able to witness someone do. I honestly think it helped bring our class closer together when we started looking for the good in each other all the time. I never that about doing something like this at home…you have inspired me-Thanks!
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